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Thursday, June 19, 2014

Why Do People Hate?



(Less than a year ago, I wrote this post and saved it as a draft. I've never posted it. In fact, I have several written drafts sitting in my blog folder. If you have been the recipient of hate, you would relate to what this post is all about.)

Have you experienced posting a status message on your Facebook page, or tweeting a message via Twitter, which ended up with hateful responses from total strangers? Perhaps, you have published a creative writing work somewhere online and received negative reviews by someone anonymous? Truth hurts, I know, but if you don't even know that person, or worst, that person didn't even actually read your written work at all, then that's really bizarre.

Why do people do that? Why do people hate on others? They bully, judge, discriminate, name-call, label, and a lot of other bad stuff, out of the blue.

Base from my observations and experiences with such characters, I'm sharing with you my thoughts:
1. Anonymity - Nicknames and cartoon avatars give people anonymity. Nobody knows who they are. When these anonymous characters comment on certain online posts (i.e. Twitter tweets, Facebook status, Blog posts, Online News articles, etc.) or post negative reviews (i.e Yelp, Zagat, etc.), they believe they can get away with it. Meaning, they will write non-sense comments about the posts just because they feel like it and won't get caught. Non-sense in a way that it hurts the poster. It provokes anger, rage, and violence towards someone unknown. For the anonymous, it's their real life comedy. Truth: It's actually sad.
2. Jealousy / Envy - When someone posts a happy message about mapping out their life's adventure, there's always one particular commenter who would make it all sound unimportant, wasteful, or simply not good enough. Just like having a post about praising someone or something, there will always be an odd ball out, a person that would oppose such bravado. The success and happiness of others give birth to evil in the hearts of jealous people. Truth: Those jealous/envious people want to attain such success but unable to do so. Sour-grape much?
3. Seeking Attention - There are individuals who crave for attention by being in everybody's business, no regards to it being done with good or bad actions. They think they're the spice of life. You know, spice, metaphorically speaking, sprinkled in everything. They think they brighten up the situation. They are unaware that too much spice makes it all bad, especially unwanted ones. Truth: They are very bland.
4. Low Self-Esteem - Hurting someone through written verbal abuse makes haters feel powerful, confident, and think they're better than their victims. They have the need to feel that way because they can't face their own boring reality. They don't want to accept that it's their own truth in life. For example: Calling someone fat, or ugly, online when they have the same body size, if not bigger than their victims, or uglier. Truth: There's a hint of seeking attention here as well. It's sad. Plus, ugly comes from within. If your attitude is ugly, it shows, no matter how much make-up covers it.
5. Expressing Hidden Angst - Hating on others, sometimes, is simply releasing a hater's own anger. They randomly select victims, and they call it productivity. Truth: Their angry feelings increase and seek for more victims. It doesn't make them feel better. They feel angrier. The more they do bad things, either to themselves or others.

Who are the people pounded at the receiving line? Here are the possible victims I've picked out:
1. Celebrities - Actors, actresses, singers, performers, bands, artists, or anybody who is in TV or movies get a lot of haters every single day of their lives.
2. Popular Non-Celebrity Peers - Popular in school, at work, or in a family.
3. Smart / Genius Achievers - Book authors and scientists are a great example. Or someone who is highly knowledgeable about a lot of stuff.
4. Rich People - People with money get a lot of envious/jealous haters.
5. Confident / Beautiful People - They are a challenge for these so-called haters. Pulling down someone from their happy state is the hater's goal.

Possible solutions:
1. Ignore it. It's the best. Don't waste your time on them.
2. Don't let it affect you. Don't stress out on it. You shouldn't even waste crying on them and what they do.
3. Smile and move on. Don't copy the hater. Spread happiness instead. Spread kindness. It's all that matters.
4. Shake your head and shrug. It's good to say "NO" to negativity. Don't let it enter your body, mind, and spirit.
5. Don't step down to their level. You have to tell yourself that you are several steps higher from their level.

All these haters need to disappear from the face of the earth.

Have you received hate lately?




2 comments:

  1. Yeah, a couple times when I've commented on a newstory someone will snark at me and then I get so pissed that I make some super sarcastic comment back to them like, 'oh a thousand pardons. I forgot you were the only person in the world allowed to have an opinion. Who pissed in your cornflakes today?' And recently I commented about former Patriots player Aaron hernandez who murdered some people and I said, 'for those of you who called Richard Sherman (of the seahawks) a punk (he was fired up after a game and talked some smack), this is what a punk really looks like'. Someone said, 'how is this about the seahawks?' and I sarcastically said, 'The subject is NFL players behaving badly. Do try to keep up'.

    But I did have a former classmate stalking me last year when I unfriended her in FB. She sent messages from her dead mother's profile, she found me on pinterest, and on google+. I had to block her everywhere. She called me a fat ugly loser and Russell must be blind to be with an old fat hag like me. I heard from a mutual friend that she's the last person who should be calling anyone fat as she's big as a house. But she's also angry and miserable and she is clearly jealous that I found a man who loves me and makes me happy. I didn't go off on her b/c I already understood her issues. I told her I wished her well and all that hate and anger wasn't good for her health and I hoped she found peace and happiness in her life.

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    1. Funny thing about these haters is that they start the fire, but if we retaliate, they act as if they're the original victim. That's what happened with me and this sad loser of a woman. You know about her. I've told you about her in our private messages. She started it all by calling me names, telling people about what kind of a person I am, yet I haven't even met her. So, I researched on what she does, and I found out what a total loser she is for how she earns her living. Now, she feels she's the victim for prying in her life. It's not prying when I'm trying to know her indirectly. She started it in the first place. Anyways, at the end, I let go. It's not worth it. I'm happy and she's not. Period.

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